So initially I was gonna post something about my trip to Nashville but something happened when I went to go pick up Toby from daycare. First let me preface this post by saying I am by no means a perfect parent. I’ve had my moments of freaking out on Toby for basically no reason. Long days, little sleep, he’s sick, you’re sick. We have all been there. At the same time no matter how bad things get, there are certain lines you simply don’t cross.
I walked in and I was looking for the director of the daycare. I wanted to let her know when Toby was going to be in daycare next week. Because of this, I didn’t go directly to the class Toby was in, instead I was looking in other rooms. I heard this woman’s voice coming from the hall. What I heard upset me. Upset me because it just sounded wrong.
The woman’s scolding her kid for pooping his pants. Not saying things like “hey you have to tell someone when you need to go to the bathroom” or “it’s ok, accidents happen”. No she was saying “you pooped your pants because you are a bad boy!” WHAT?? Really?? The kid pooped himself because he’s bad?? The worst part is she kept saying it! Over and over. “You pooped yourself because you’re bad!” Maybe it was because he was four years old and probably was more worried about playing than going to the potty. Maybe it was an accident, maybe he shartted!
Seriously, though this was one of the more ridiculous things I’ve heard a parent say to a kid. You pooped your pants because you’re a bad boy. What the heck is this lady going to say if he beats someone up? Or gets caught drunk driving and almost kills someone? Is she going to call him a bad boy then? We as parents need to recognize that there are some things that our kids are going to do that maybe wrong but it doesn’t make them bad.
This weekend I drove from Nashville back home. It was a 12 hour drive when you include all the breaks we took. Did Toby cry and fuss? Of course. Did he get angry and demand things? Yeah. What else should I expect? Was he bad? No! He was being a 3yr old that was trapped in a car for 10hrs. What he was doing was natural. The little boy that I saw getting yelled at for pooping his pants was probably no more than 4. The kid is going to have an accident, it doesn’t make him bad. Personally, I hope when this lady is old and her kid has to take care of her and she poops her pants, he scolds her and calls her bad.
The Hopeful Rants of a Cynic 
It is SO hard for me to not get involved when I hear things like that, if for the sake of the child. Ugh.
Yeah… I really didn’t want to make a scene. Blah
One thing I have realized since becoming a parent are how many BAD PARENTS THERE ARE! Sometimes I literally feel like I am the only person in the store that has any sort of a connection with my child let alone engages in my son’s life. You see people that just use children as bunching bags for whatever the hell there mouth spews out that day. I cant even begin to tell you how many parents there are that are just bad, and I mean literally horrible parents. That scream, cuss, yell, spit, slap, etc. their children. Most of the time the people don’t even look twice to see if anybody is watching. A few months ago I went into a local store to grab some boxes b/c I was moving. I hear this child just crying sooooooooo loud. I am thinking its a two or three year old. I am looking around and I can’t find where its coming from, it goes on for about 7 or so minutes until I finally see the kid and its atleast a 8 or 9 year old! WITH NO DAMN SHOES ON! STILL SCREAMING! The mom finally comes around and is like WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU. The child says I hit my head, and the mom is just screaming at this kid. And the kid is screaming in pain. Then the mom just leaves the kid in the store and walks outside. Just leaves after she screams at the top of her lungs at him. The child follows a a few minutes later. And I am just standing there wondering what in the HELL did I just watch.
Yeah that’s pretty crazy! Trust me I know about bad parents. I work with the product of bad parents. Most of the issues that the students at my facility are the product of bad parenting or the product of terrible people having kids.