I was pumped today. Excited even. See Toby has been playing with these two Superman action figures for about two weeks now. It’s his newest fixation. In to the bathtub they go. Going to the store? They are coming too! How about bed? Can’t sleep without then. I was excited because I showed him an old Superman cartoon and he watched the whole thing. I was tempted to download all the Superman movies.
The reason why I was so excited is because I was going to surprise Toby. I stopped at Walmart on the way home and bought him a Superman costume to wear tomorrow. Sure it is prolly a size too big, but hey I can work around that. I also bought him a pair of Superman light up shoes too!
I put the bag in my trunk so he wouldn’t see it when I picked him from daycare. We got home and I got him settled in. I went to the car and got the bag. I told him I had a surprise for him. He got so excited. I pulled out the costume and… He cried. He didn’t want to be Superman. Didn’t even want to try the costume on. I tried all my negotiation tactics. Nothing. The FBI’s top negotiator couldn’t convince this kid.
I was devastated. Then I realized something. I wanted him to be Superman, he never wanted to be Superman, so why did I think he would put on a costume? I think sometimes as parents we forget that out kids or grand kids or whomever you watch, have a mind of their own. Here I was trying to impose what I wanted and never really considering what he wanted. As parents we just get use to imposing our will on them when they are babies, then they begin to grow and get ideas of their own. It’s easy to forget that this little person has preferences.
It’s obvious now. He plays with the Superman action figures. Ignores the boxes, baskets, and piles of other toys. Of all the toys he wants to take with him on a simple 2 minute car ride to the store? The Supermen. The kid has mind of his own. He didn’t want to be Superman. I wanted him to be. What does Toby want to be? And I quote “Shimy armor cowboy”. Which translates into “Shiny armor cowboy”, which really means a knight chest plate, shield, cowboy hat, a home made horse, light up cowboy boots and a pirate sword. This is what he wants to be for Halloween. Of all the things in the world. This is what he wants. Not what I want, but what he wants. So tomorrow, I’ll dress him up as a “shimy armor cowboy” and drop him off at school, wearing what he wants.