Dear Toby, (6/2/13)

Dear Toby,

Today you were pretty upset. I asked you why you were crying and you said you missed mommy. It killed me. Not that you missed your mom but because there wasn’t anything I could do about it. I couldn’t make it better. The sucky part is that neither one of us is at fault, even your mom isn’t at fault. It’s just the situation that we are in. This is a quick parenting lesson for me. The lesson is that there will be things the bother you, that you are upset about, and things will happen that I simply cannot fix. It’s ironic because earlier you were having me flex my bicep muscle and was saying how strong I was. Here I am weak beyond words because I cannot fix what you are upset about.

I know that there are going to be other times in your life that things will happen that I cannot do anything about. Heartbreaks, failures, and just life happening. As a parent it is something I will just have to endure. It is the weight of any parent, to watch their child suffer with no recourse or action.

I laid down with you and you put your head on my shoulder. I told you I loved you. Just laying there you finally fell asleep for your nap. That’s all I could do. It feels like it isn’t enough.

Love,
Friend Dad
073

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