Blurred Attempts

Ever just have one of those days where it seemed that no matter what happened things just went perfectly? You played a sport and you hit the game winner. Out with your friends and you said all the right things. Spent that perfect night with someone. Then there are those days when it seems like nothing can go right. You misplace your keys when you’re running late. The kid gets sick the night before a big meeting. All you do all day is fight and argue. What do those two days have in common? Timing. In the perfect day the timing is amazing. Everything feels in sync. In the terrible day, timing is just off. Not a lot but just enough.

It’s hard for me to say my entire life timing has been off for me, if you know anything about me you’ll know I’m pretty fortunate. On the other side of the coin, things have just felt off. I don’t know why. They have. There really hasn’t been a time where I felt 100% on track in life. Always had this sensation of playing catch up. Maybe it’s the difficulties that I face really connecting with people or being in the moment.

Sometimes I look at my life and it’s like watching and old movie where the focus is off… Much like the local movie theater. The floors are sticky, the sound is muffled, the movie is slightly slanted sideways and just blurry enough to almost kinda notice. One half of me says it’s just life, suck it up and move on. The other side says, no something isn’t right. It’s almost like those perfect days are far and few between. Each day in between those perfect days are blurred attempts that fail miserably. It just seems like for some, the perfect days happen more frequently. While others, once in a blue moon.

Honestly can’t remember the last perfect day. The last time life seemed to fall into place for me. Maybe, it’s just the way life is. Maybe my expectations are too high. I suppose what keeps each of us going is the pursuit of that perfect day. Maybe i’ll go to sleep and wake up tomorrow and have a perfect day. I don’t know. Once again I am left with no answers. This is probably my first real rant on here.

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One thought on “Blurred Attempts

  1. I like the movie theater analogy. Isn’t life interesting? Keep taking ownership of your feelings and moving forward. Life is a great adventure and there are many places to go, many people to meet. You have much to teach Toby and much to learn from him!

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