I don’t know if this has ever happened to you, but it just happened to me. You hear a song over and over but you never really listen to it. You simply hear the words, maybe even sing the chorus line a few times. Then you stop. Then you really listen to the words. Chances are I’m not the only one. I was laying down and put on The Black Keys Pandora, if you know me at all you know that this is pretty much all I listen to. The song “Hallelujah” by Rufus Wainwright came on. Sadly enough the only reason why I know this song at all is because of the movie Shrek. I stopped. I listened to the lyrics. The line that simply killed me was “Love is not a victory march, It’s a cold and broken Hallelujah.”
Maybe its the chaos of my life right now. Maybe its the deep roots that I have in The Church. Maybe its just my inner soul craving more than just the same old crap. I don’t rightfully know how to explain it. I think of weddings and how the happy couple walks down the isle like they have accomplished something. Like they just won a championship. Like a victory march. When in reality, the preseason and the practice is over and the real season has just begun. The victory march down the church isle is all for naught if the marriage doesn’t survive the “regular” season. If anyone deserves a victory march its my grandparents who have been married literally forever… They deserve a parade. A party. People lining up along main street throwing them flowers and celebrating with them. Its curious to me that marriage is one of the few things we celebrate the beginning of. The “cold and broken Hallelujah” is a that cry when no one is looking. Thanking God for what you have. The same cry I whisper when I kiss Toby goodnight. The one that no on sees or hears, except God. That’s the celebration. The celebration of love. It isn’t wedding, the party, the dancing, or the gifts. Its years down the road and still saying Hallelujah.
Yeah, I’m not done yet. Sorry. So the next song that popped on my Black Keys Pandora was Mumford & Sons “Sigh No More”. I know I’m late to the party on them. Again, I stopped and listened. They sang “Love that will not betray you, Dismay or enslave you, It will set you free”. In my mind I put both lines together:
Love is not a victory march. It’s a cold and broken Hallelujah. It will not betray you, dismay or enslave you. It will set you free.
If an alien ship landed and they asked me to explain what love was. This would be the definition for me. It wouldn’t make sense to them. Hell, it barely makes sense to me. So as I begin my search for this thing that everyone wants. This will be my standard. My definition. Back to the first post…”Now what?” I have no idea…but at least now I have a definition.
House keeping stuff…I added a widget (thanks to Jeremy) so you can get email updates on my blog. Feel free to comment.